Thursday, October 29, 2009

So, can someone tell me

when this "better" thing starts happening. People keep saying it'll get better and it'll be alright but I dont see it anywhere around me.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

So tired

of all of this. Im failing out of school and none of my teachers bother to tell me this until two fucking days before we get report cards. Hey, thank you so much for giving me the time to bring my fucking grade up, assholes.

I hate everyone so much. Everyone is like "hey, talk to me. Tell me what's wrong. I wish you would open up to me" it's all fake. No one really cares, because as soon as I TRY to open up to someone they come back with their own problems. Now we know why I keep everything inside.
What I'd really like is to get in some terrible accident and never have to see anyone again.
Or get put in an insane asylum away from the rest of this world. Im so tired of it all.

There isnt really anything else to say. Pray for my daddy, please. :////

Friday, October 16, 2009

This is the end, if you want it

I want nothing more than someone who will truly care about me for once and be a good friend.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Today.

I said, "I hate everyone and everything, today. I hate everyone and everything except for you."
You said, nothing.
I spoke in empty stalls in locked restrooms and screamed against the walls, while you sat on the opposite side of the building leafing through the pages of a textbook. I said, "I hate everything and everyone, and I wish I could hate even you, today."
You said, nothing.
I eyed your reflection in the tinted window, as you sat behind me, avoiding my figure. Your eyes mirrored flames of red that you called crimson and green that you named slytherin. I cried and wiped my eyes, and you never saw me because today is really no different than any other.
I said, "I hate everything and everyone, and I wish I could hate you, but I can't. I love you, and today, I wish I loved someone else a little more, instead."
You said something, but it was mumbled under your breath and drowned out in the shuffling of your sneakers as you walked away.

Sunday, October 04, 2009

I lie awake and miss you.


I dont eat anymore. I never leave my bedroom. I hardly speak to anyone. I cry over the stupidest and smallest things, but mostly you.
No one notices.
I wish I had the courage and strength to tell you exactly how I feel.